100 MPH

I am not the kind of person who is used to doing a lot at a time. I do like to keep busy, but the busyness is often kept to a manageable pace. However, manageable pace is not how I would describe this season in my life. For example, it is almost 1 a.m. and I am wide awake. My brain seems to be going at a 100 mph lately figuring what I have done and what still needs to be done.

Aside from my continuing education on patience, time management has also been added to this curriculum. Currently, I am working a part-time job, a “part-time” part-time job, taking 2 college courses, in the town’s production of Music Man and preparing to lead a Surrendering the Secret (STS) training study in a few weeks. There is hardly any time to slow down, but everything still needs to get done and everything needs to be done with intention, not haphazardly.

It seems like a lot and it may be, but how I  have chosen to look at it is the Lord is blessing me with opportunities to grow. Each individual task speaks to me in its own unique way. My jobs speak to the head household in me. The college courses are leading to the career in nursing I have always wanted. The Music Man production speaks to the theater lover in me. While finally, beginning to lead STS again draws me back to the calling on my heart. And all of these combined, are helping me grow as a successful, well-rounded,  woman.

Success and being well-rounded have always been a desire of mine.  There was a time I wished to be on a path to something greater than I could imagine for myself; and today the Lord is reminding that coveted road is a road I have been on all along. Where I have been has prepared for me this season and this current season is preparing for what is to come. Yet, I am also reminded that even though things might be going 100 mph,  I need to stop, gas up and rest often so the joy of the trip is not lost by the rush to get to the destination.

Safety Bar

What do you do the second you are about to be hurled down a huge roller coaster drop? If you are like me, you avoid roller coasters at all costs, but on the rare occasion I do get on, I grab the safety bar and hold on tight…

Ever since I was a little girl, I wanted to be a doctor or a nurse practitioner, so in 2010, I decided to quit my job and pursue the more attainable goal of nursing. I quit my job in June of that year, took a nursing assistant course and became certified just a few months later in October. By December, I was working in a hospital. It was like a dream, I was not yet a nurse, but the passion and the desire had been reignited and it was burning strong. It wasn’t only a dream now, it was something I knew, through experience and the encouragement of so many, was something I could do. I prayed for a long time and felt that pursuing a nursing degree was the direction I should take. I attempted to go back to school, but due to previous failed attempts and deferred loans, I did not qualify for financial aid. I was discouraged, but not defeated. It just wasn’t the time, again.

You see, I have started and stopped the process of going back to school a couple of times, but something always seemed to get in the way….Right after high school, I went to Messiah College with the hopes of doing something in the medical field. I was torn between pre-med and psychology, but never really got to choose because 3 semesters in, I was kicked out because my tuition had not been paid. Several years later, I wanted to go back to school for nursing, but decided to go for Marketing instead because that was a degree my job would pay for. After 3 classes, however, I was laid off from that job and was not able to afford to continue school.  The desire never left me, but I had failed enough times, I was taking it as a sign that I wasn’t meant to go to school.

This year, however, a portion of my tax return paid off the balance of those deferred loans. So, I decided to go to Alabama Southern Community College here in Thomasville and see what I could do. I was told to apply to the college, for financial aid, request transcripts from high school and colleges and provide proof of state residency. Three weeks ago, I was accepted to the school and today received notice that I was approved for a Pell Grant. In my excitement, I went to the school to see what were my next steps (placement test on May 2nd and that will determine what courses I need to begin with), but in speaking with the student adviser, I was told that because I am still missing a transcript from the school I originally went almost 20 years ago, I would only be able to attend school for 1 semester. This was disheartening because the reason I do not have that transcript is because there is still a balance of over $8,000.

Now, let me tell you that $8,000 stipulation would have stopped me before. I would have been discouraged and would have shelved the idea, but this time it’s different; I am different. I know that this…is…the…time! I have no doubt the Lord has declared this is the time for me to go back to school. He has provided the financial aid, the motivation and the time to go to school. How can it not be the right time? So, I will take my placement test, complete the semester I can do and pray all the while that the Lord will reveal how that balance will be paid.

I am learning that sometimes things come in our way to keep us from going down a wrong road. Other times, God uses obstacles to let us know to wait on Him. And yet other times, obstacles are placed in our path so we can hold on tight and watch God bust right through them. Let’s just say this is one of those times, so I am holding on tight to my safety bar…Jesus!