I am not sure if you could tell from yesterday’s post, but I was having somewhat of a bad day. Well, my bad day got much worse…
Yesterday, was the last day of school before a week off and no one really wanted to be there. We were all already on vacation mode. The difference between the U.S. and Guatemala is that everything is so laid back here, they decided to dismiss everyone a half an hour early. This should’ve made me happy, but I was feeling a sore throat coming on, so I wasn’t as cheerful as I could have been.
When we got back home, we ate lunch (well I didn’t because my throat was really sore by then and food wasn’t all that appealing to me). I don’t recall most of the happenings of the following few hours, but I can recall the discouragement that was consuming me; I felt like I had no right being in a different country when my life back home is in such a disarray (meaning no place to call home or stable job). I felt like coming to Guatemala was a huge mistake. I felt myself sinking deeper. Then, the lights went out…
Jake had gone with Debora to pick up one of her classmates because they were going to do some homework here at the house. I wasn’t feeling well, so I stayed behind. By the time, they got back, the lights were still out and Debora suggested she drop us off at local gas station/restaurant where Jake and I could be in air conditioning, could eat and be on the internet while she finished up her homework at her friend’s house. Sounded like a good idea, except the food was not good, the WiFi wasn’t working on my laptop and there wasn’t a bathroom. We had no choice but to sit and wait for Debora to come get us. While sitting there, Jake asked “would this be considered a problem God can turn into a Blessing?” Boy, I sure was praying that was the case.
What I forgot to mention was that before the lights went out, I was online chatting with Brian. He was trying to encourage me and let me know that God would take care of us and that we were doing what He had asked us to do. I was able to be online on my phone while we were at the gas station, so I was able to continue chatting with Brian. He was so sweet and continued to be the voice of calm and reason I needed because I was on a downward spiral.
We finally got home (the lights were back on by this time) and all I wanted to do was go to bed, but I knew that despite my mood and my discouragement this was an opportunity to show Jake that no matter what we are feeling, God is still in control. I asked Brian what he suggested we read in the Bible and he mentioned Joshua. I remembered the “sun stand still” story and decided it would be perfect to read to encourage Jake.
Since my throat was still hurting, I asked Jake to read Joshua 10:1-15 out loud for us. As he read, I was praying that the words would encourage him and let him know that God was in control. When he finished, I tried to summarize and say that as the Lord said to Joshua in verse 8; “ Do not fear them, for I have given them into your hands; not one of them shall stand before you.” We shouldn’t fear because anything that comes our way, He will take care of.
My boy proceeds to say, “I thought tonight was a hoot!” A hoot? I’m here freaking out, all discouraged and trying to figure out how to encourage him and he says it was a “hoot”? My response in disbelief, “I am glad you thought it to be that way”. He was like “Mother, we were safe, in air conditioning and we had food. It wasn’t that bad.” Not knowing how to respond, we closed in prayer. Jake opened and began to thank God for keeping us safe, letting us “get out of the house”, giving us food, air conditioning while at the gas station and soft comfy beds to come home to. Through tears and a completely humbled heart, I closed. I thanked God for my son for being the tangible encouragement I needed and for reminding me that I don’t have to have it all together or even pretend that I do because He always does.
So, today, I still have my sore throat and am still wondering what life will be like when we return home, but what I do know is that as long as I have my men (all 3 of them), I will be just fine! As I type this, I am also reminded that in my weakness, not only is God stronger, but it allows Brian and Jake to be the leaders and encouragers God called them to be.
Father God, thank You for always being with me and providing encouragement and love through Brian and Jake. Help me never to lose hope or sight that You hold each of us in the palm of Your Precious and Almighty hand!
This is wonderful! There is a light that shines through the gray clouds. And that is Jesus! And it is being reflected through the purest of hearts (Jake). So you’ve humbly realized that your discouragement is creating a space for Jake to be perhaps a leader, a listener of God, an encourager, but most of all he is able to tangibly see the Lord’s power in everything. Awesome!!